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How do you cope/deal with stress?

How do you cope/deal with stress?

Glossop North Ender

Glossop North Ender

Joined
Jul 15, 2007
Messages
1,092
How the bloody hell do you cope with yours?

My woes and worries are nothing compared to lots and lots of people but it's a bit of a bad spell at the minute.

Am not drinking booze, trying to eat well and get plenty fresh air and exercise but it's getting a bit much and wanted to ask about it here before it gets worse.

Long walks on an early morning with dog have been good medicine but she's lame at the minute and worrying about her is on the list of things to worry about.

Am usually pretty good at worrying only about the stuff I can influence and not so much about stuff I can't but it's all of it a bit of a struggle lately.

Going to talk to Mrs G about it when I get chance but it's really hard finding the time and space to do it properly without burdering her further and worrying her unnecessarily.

This is probably the best thing I can do but it's not easy. She's brilliant and would be brilliant but I think she's got enough to cope with without a big man baby to look after as well.

Really appreciate having the space here to write this and not get the piss taken too much.
 
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For me I’ve found writing down the things that are causing stress just to get them out of my head. When you’ve got a million things buzzing round in your head it’s hard to focus and that’s what causes the stress (for me anyway!)

When it’s down in front of you then it also makes it easier to talk to someone about it and seek help.

Trying to put the phone down and avoiding doomscrolling for hours is an obvious. Putting aside even 30 mins to get lost in a book helps. Especially before bed.

Getting time to yourself, being active, avoiding the booze etc. all good too. I’ve been trying to dabble in a bit of meditation (not something I’d normally do but worth a try) but it’s proving difficult, maybe it will click at some point.

Hope you get sorted anyway, there’s always help out there, and you’re not the only one dealing with it.
 
Glossop North Ender said:
How the bloody hell do you cope with yours?

My woes and worries are nothing compared to lots and lots of people but it's a bit of a bad spell at the minute.

Am not drinking booze, trying to eat well and get plenty fresh air and exercise but it's getting a bit much and wanted to ask about it here before it gets worse.

Long walks on an early morning with dog have been good medicine but she's lame at the minute and worrying about her is on the list of things to worry about.

Am usually pretty good at worrying only about the stuff I can influence and not so much about stuff I can't but it's all of it a bit of a struggle lately.

Going to talk to Mrs G about it when I get chance but it's really hard finding the time and space to do it properly without burdering her further and worrying her unnecessarily.

This is probably the best thing I can do but it's not easy. She's brilliant and would be brilliant but I think she's got enough to cope with without a big man baby to look after as well.

Really appreciate having the space here to write this and not get the piss taken too much.
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Not sure this is helpful, but honestly, I go to the docs and get Valium.
This isn't for 'everyday stress' obviously, it's when things get overwhelmingly difficult, unable to focus on anything, everything's spiralling, etc. Had it myself recently and was also getting panic attacks (I get it every now and again probably as part of my depression and anxiety).
The Valium just helps to take the edge off, calm the farm and allow you to actually focus on things instead of everything spinning round your head.
It's a schedule 8 drug so docs don't give out much (obvs it's addictive), but I definitely get it scripted for short term relief when really needed.
 
It's fairly generic but these are the resources our lot use based on the Mental Health training provider we've used at our work. Can't link to the actual poster sorry. You sound like you are doing a lot of these already mind, so probably preaching to what you know.

Take regular breaks - Build breaks into your work schedule. Stepping back allows you to better process and retain information and can help you cultivate healthy habits such as making time for exercise,however you can
Share how you feel - Too much stress can lead to mental ill health and decreased performance.Check in with others and yourself. Our My Whole Self MOT and Talking tips help you approach conversations about mental health to support employee wellbeing. Find our free resources at mhfaengland.org/my-whole-self
Boost your energy levels - Maintain a healthy diet that works for you. Nutritious snacks can improve your mood and give you more energy. Staying well-hydrated improves your cognition.Reduce your screen time Improve your sense of digital wellbeing. Set yourself boundaries, take breaks between screen time or pause notifications to help reduce fatigue and give your eyes a break.
Set aside time for self-care - Give yourself permission to have fun, switch off and unwind after work. Actively making time for yourself as a regular part of your routine, helps to avoid overworking.Top tip: schedule self-care reminders.
Learn a new skill - Learning is exciting and rewarding. Try something new at work or in your personal life. It can help keep your mind engaged and boost your confidence as you develop a new skill.
Sleep well - Try to pay attention to your sleep hygiene, such as daily routines and a comfortable environment to aid better sleep. Getting good sleep when you will help you feel refreshed,alert and healthy

One thing someone mentioned during some course a while back with things like stress is to counter it with your senses, i.e. putting music on you like or other senses like smell. Almost like being a baby again but having something with a scent you associate with something else works to distract your brain and take you out of the here and now, but something specific to you, so maybe like the smell of your dog(as that's seemingly something you associate with more pleasant moments, or a perfume or something. Go the whole hog and bottle the stench of the Kop or the Town End urinals from the 90s. Something about olfactory being a strong sense so it overpowers your brain more than others. No idea how successful it is.

And to your other point about burdening your wife, I'm sure she'd prefer to know how you're feeling than being unaware and then feeling a bit helpless about it all. Glad you've reached out and good to see what others have done in similar moments
 
I find that I worry more the less I exercise. Running, cycling and the gym are my go to's. I like to do it before work. Some of the things I worry about will be work related and it's amazing how many times I've come up with a solution to the problem while out on a run or in the gym with my air pods in and some tunes on.
 
For me, it's going for a walk and picking up my guitar. They both take me away from any worries or stress that may be going on in my life.

As somebody who has suffered on and off throughout my life, talking is paramount. A good mate will always listen and share that burden, and talking to a doctor or counsellor can only help.

I do hope you get your issues fixed and your life back on track Glossop.
 
Good to share
I am a natural born worrier - it’s simply how I am designed.
So for too many years I worried about my worrying until I had to seek help, therapy in fact, one of the biggest take outs is a bit of a scenario I’ve coined as my own, how many times do you hear “don’t worry about it” to which you internally think maybe sarcastically “well that’s sorted it 🙄” and then you go off to worry 🤔
So here’s a coping mechanism, don’t fight the worry or anxiety it causes, try as much as you can to focus on worst case and best case scenarios - what is the likelihood of worst case, almost a line yes / no diagram ( I often do these), you will more than often find that logic will prevail and take you to a sensible conclusion, and if that still involves a worry or concern then focus on what to do to address that.
Hopefully that makes some kind of sense?
Trying to make it go away generally won’t work, deal with the cause, not the symptom
 
Not so great but take on each step/challenge one by one and don’t let it overtake you and build up. Outside of that, gym, run, walk, sports etc are all great, always good with others but time alone especially walking has done me a lot of good - during COVID it was brilliant, hours a day spent after half days at work just mooching.
 
cornwall92 said:
Not so great but take on each step/challenge one by one and don’t let it overtake you and build up. Outside of that, gym, run, walk, sports etc are all great, always good with others but time alone especially walking has done me a lot of good - during COVID it was brilliant, hours a day spent after half days at work just mooching.
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I forgot and thank goodness you advised, walking is an incredible calmer, especially a walk you may not be familiar with, it occupies the mind in a positive manner and provides great focus and self worth as well as achievement
 
Lord Edgington said:
I forgot and thank goodness you advised, walking is an incredible calmer, especially a walk you may not be familiar with, it occupies the mind in a positive manner and provides great focus and self worth as well as achievement
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I walk plenty when home, 90 minutes to 2 hours after work if I don’t go to the gym. I always feel great after and ready to relax and sleep afterwards. I listen to music but mainly podcasts and it takes my mind off everything so I feel calm and composed after.
 
Flippin_lump said:
Keep counting you're blessings every morning before you do anything... it might re program you're consciousness into 1 that is happier.... don't take vallium.. you didn't say what the actual worries are but it's better to face them instead of going into a comatose state to forget them.
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Got time to reply to this one, it's a lovely idea but part of the issue has been waking myself and Mrs G up at quarter three and other extremely unsocial times by shouting "fucks sake" "fucking hell" and other variations as soon as my brain spots half a glimpse of consciousness and it starts with the worries on turbo charge before any rationality kicks in.

Not sure it's healthy.

They are only normal worries (job, money, Christmas, family, family health etc etc) so definitely have less than many to worry about.

Didn't shout this morning though, so that's a start!
 
I suspect, like all/most? Men I bottle everything up until it feels like my head is being squeezed and everybody looks like they could do with a good kicking, which of course is frowned upon in modern society for some inane reason.
So, I play minecraft on creative mode. It seems silly I know, but it just seems to work for me.
It's also helped me to spend more time with the youngest. We've managed to create some impressive worlds between us. Plus it's a lot cheaper than Lego.
 
Glossop North Ender said:
Got time to reply to this one, it's a lovely idea but part of the issue has been waking myself and Mrs G up at quarter three and other extremely unsocial times by shouting "fucks sake" "fucking hell" and other variations as soon as my brain spots half a glimpse of consciousness and it starts with the worries on turbo charge before any rationality kicks in.

Not sure it's healthy.

They are only normal worries (job, money, Christmas, family, family health etc etc) so definitely have less than many to worry about.

Didn't shout this morning though, so that's a start!
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I think you may have Father Jack Syndrome my friend
 
unconvinced said:
So, I play minecraft on creative mode. It seems silly I know, but it just seems to work for me.
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Me and my Mrs do everything together, so when one of us hits a low, like currently, we sit down and play a game on the PlayStation, it's usually a beat em up, streets of rage 1 to 4 are our go to, it's unreal how it lifts you (but that's just us) if we can't do that we walk, we plan a route and really enjoy the disconnect from the humdrum of everyday life and work stress, the great outdoors really does help.
 
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