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Statement Bingo

Statement Bingo

After a very disappointing season we have conducted a full review of our staff and infrastructure.

We are therefore now looking to recruit a new Chief Executive, Director of Football and a Global Head of Analytics and Recruitment. These will no longer be tasked by one single person. We need to modernise our approach and have accountability for individual actions.

We also realise we've neglected our youth academy over the last decade, but we have now identified suitable land to build an indoor dome plus extra pitches - construction work will commence this summer and will be ready in 2026.

We are also investing in increasing academy staffing levels and adding extra age groups including a U-23 squad. We no longer wish to be a club that only lives up to the adage... "none of our own".

Fans can be assured these changes will not affect our FFP levels or our commitment to putting together a squad that can compete in the top half in 2025/26. Focus will be placed on players under the age of 25 in order to reduce the average age of the squad.


Oh... the OP said what will be included. Let's see...

Very unlucky with KMI's, FA cup quarter final, big squad changes this summer, PH will still need 3 or 4 transfer windows, we need you to be our 12th man, season ticket prices frozen, evolution not revolution, parachute payments, lemme hear you say "thank you boss"?! Oi oi oi"...
 
If he's feeling adventurous something along the lines of "there will be significant changes to arrest this slide" then only Peter Murphy will leave.
 
…hampered by the early unforeseeable departure of our previous manager which had us playing catch-up from the start.
 
For inspiration, here's a word cloud from Craig's last 4 sermons (top 50 words):

Craig-Word-Cloud.jpg
 
Alpine White said:
you mean that the club has now accepted that the best approach is with resignation to an upcoming relegation, right?
Click to expand...
😂

Maybe wishful thinking but ‘have reluctantly accepted the resignation of Peter Ridsdale’ was where I was pitching really.
 
Thracia said:
For inspiration, here's a word cloud from Craig's last 4 sermons (top 50 words):

Craig-Word-Cloud.jpg
Click to expand...
I've cracked most of the code...

Sustainable. Income. Coming.
Academy. Budget. Costs. Money.
Wish. Financial. Investment. Better.
Premier. League. Best. Hope.
Early. Summer. Player. Sales.
Recruitment. Improve. Team.
Experience. Better. Squad.
Board. Fans. Support. Years.
Championship. Football. Success. End.
PS. Help. Peter. Continue.
 
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