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Giving up the gambling

  • Thread starter Thread starter K Rogers
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Giving up the gambling

K

K Rogers

Hello,

I hope it's ok to ask for help on this matter here as I want to make a change and stop betting.

I guess Ive got to quite full stop and go cold turkey? No point trying to wean myself off it is there??

Have been off cigs for nearly twelve years so do have a bit of will power, not sure if it helps though.

Any tips or advice would be very much appreciated, thankyou.

Starting a new chapter in life and want to make this change.
 
K Rogers said:
Hello,

I hope it's ok to ask for help on this matter here as I want to make a change and stop betting.

I guess Ive got to quite full stop and go cold turkey? No point trying to wean myself off it is there??

Have been off cigs for nearly twelve years so do have a bit of will power, not sure if it helps though.

Any tips or advice would be very much appreciated, thankyou.

Starting a new chapter in life and want to make this change.
Click to expand...
 
I’m not a gambler because I’m tight and a hate wasting money but I do know of a chap who nearly lost the lot through it. Wife, kids, house etc. He ended up going to a residential thing where he stayed for a week and got sorted through that.
I suppose it depends on how deep you are in - if you are still enjoying it and can afford the loss, then carry on. If not, have a look for an organisation in town. Just go and have a chat - there’s nothing to be ashamed of. The first step is done - you’ve already asked for help, so well done with that.
 
Maybe try gambleaware as a starting point who might be able to suggest some local options

Home

Free, confidential advice, tools and support for anyone who’s worried about their – or someone else’s – gambling. If gambling’s on your mind, we’re here to help.
www.gambleaware.org www.gambleaware.org

Small steps make sure you’ve deleted the apps off your mobile and unsubscribe from marketing mails and texts aswell

And well done for reaching out in the first instance. Thats the biggest step you’ll ever take
 
Well done for admitting you need to make a change. That's always the first step.

I'm wondering if it's worth you having a look at Andy's Man Club and seeing what they might offer you. I just did a quick Google and found this.

www.thesquareball.net

Andy's Man Club: It's Okay to Talk About... Money • The Square Ball

A chat with Oli from Andy's Man Club about money: your relationship to it, debt, gambling, and being reckless versus being careful.
www.thesquareball.net www.thesquareball.net
 
Firstly - well done for posting this.

You're clearly aware this is an issue for you and are wanting to make positive changes.

Sometimes that can be a big step in itself, so good on you mate 👍


I have a close friend who's had / having issues with Gambling and he leans a lot on the support of other people, even virtually, there are a lot of useful support forums out there, in particular he's cited the following, though there are many out there, just have a google:

GamCare Forum

Forums Archive - Gambling Therapy

www.gamblingtherapy.org www.gamblingtherapy.org



FWIW - In his case, he said he did wean himself off it, going cold turkey never worked for him and so he had extreamly set limits and would bet £10 a week, usually spread about a load of things, 20p on a football match, another 20p on a horse, etc. When the £10 was spent that was it and if he ended up in profit it was gratefully withdrawn and spent elsewhere.

His fiancee / wife was very aware of it all and they had a system where to make him fully transparent and accountable, he reverted to getting paper bank statements sent to him every month and she'd check it all over to make sure he was sticking to his plan, as well as having access to his betting accounts, etc.

Along side this though he was also working on exploring the reasons for his addiction, the science behind it, etc and worked to stop it altogether in the end - it took time though.

This worked for him (them) and it massively limited his problems, both in terms of the financial element, but also having unburdened himself of the guilt, having his partner to help him, though he was keen to stress that what works for one person may not work at all for someone else, so be wary - everyone is different and has different circumstances.

Allow yourself the time and forgiveness whilst you search for a way to find a best course of action for yourself.

All the best!
 
K Rogers said:
Hello,

I hope it's ok to ask for help on this matter here as I want to make a change and stop betting.

I guess Ive got to quite full stop and go cold turkey? No point trying to wean myself off it is there??

Have been off cigs for nearly twelve years so do have a bit of will power, not sure if it helps though.

Any tips or advice would be very much appreciated, thankyou.

Starting a new chapter in life and want to make this change.
Click to expand...
The question I believe you should ask yourself is "am I addicted to gambling?"
A good definition of addiction is- is this habit having a detrimental effect on my life? Do I find this habit it difficult to quit? If it's yes to both then it's safe to say it's an addiction.
I know there is lots of practical help out there if you just Google it.
There is always an underlying cause with any addiction and you might be ready to start to explore this- I say this from experience with addictions myself so there's denitely no judgement from me.
A good book to read on this is by Dr Gabor Maté 'In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts".
Here's a youtube clip from him which I have found useful.
Something to consider.
 
Good on you for making the decision. I would think cold turkey would be the way to go. I just can't imagine how weaning yourself would be anything other than continuing to feed the habit.

Good luck, and we're here for you!

Sam Elliott Hello GIF by GritTV
 
Got to be cold turkey.

If it's online betting then start by restricting all your accounts. You'll know this already but the websites and Apps make it very easy to create self-imposed deposit rules. Set this to zero. Add a 6 month time-out.

Better still, just shut them all down. You can even ask your banks & cards to block any transactions to specific companies.

Use an Ad-blocker on your web browser(s). Or do everything in Chrome Incognito mode (on laptop, desktop, mobiles, everywhere). This will stop you being stalked by betting companies.

Shut down your email address and set up a new one. You'll be getting dozens of inbox offers every day so that will stop them shoving stuff down your throat.

And good luck. But just do it.
 
I wish you luck, what I will say is make sure you remove all apps, like the free Slots off any phones. Because they are made to hook you into gambling, they start off small bets and then they get bogger, start asking for money for Coins and then the Adverts start and your back in. I know someone that was clear of Gambling for 12 years. She down loaded one simple Slot app on her Tab. "Slot World" I think. She got excited by a few wins. Telling people its free, you get free coins from Ads. Then the wins dried up, she wanted more coins because that 300Million free coins a day where not enough for 10 Minutes play as the Min coins where 250k a spin. Started asking her for money for more coins. She then decided to go on real slots if she using real money, She ended up in rehab and she's not the same.

So you serious, get rid of any free slots, poker apps, because your not going cold Turkey with them they just a slide back in. Good luck
 
Cheers lads, much appreciated.

Have gone on to Gamstop and got myself excluded from all online stuff for twelve months. Apparently they have to remove all your contact details so they shouldn't be spamming me.

Going to do the same in my local shop.

Starting new job next week so hopefully that takes my mind off it and I don't miss it too much.

Fucking stupid to have wasted so much over the years but going to look forward rather than over my shoulder!
 
Not gambling, but when I packed up smoking I got a big glass jar and put a fiver in it every day I didn't smoke. Representing the money I was no longer wasting each day, I found this visual prop really helped and made me more determined to quit.

I would count the cash every few weeks and planned things I would do with the money to improve my situation. Pay off debts faster, over pay on the mortgage, book a holiday and pay it outright. Put some in a savings account & invest some etc. From small acorns mighty oaks grow.
 
K Rogers said:
Cheers lads, much appreciated.

Have gone on to Gamstop and got myself excluded from all online stuff for twelve months. Apparently they have to remove all your contact details so they shouldn't be spamming me.

Going to do the same in my local shop.

Starting new job next week so hopefully that takes my mind off it and I don't miss it too much.

Fucking stupid to have wasted so much over the years but going to look forward rather than over my shoulder!
Click to expand...
Nice. Sounds daft, but have you thought about investing in a games console? something to take your mind off it when you have spare hours in the day? Doesn't have to be gaming, but something that is just easy to pick up at any time and keeps your mind busy.
 
Just adding alcohol. If you lose your inhibitions to the point where you can't relate what your doing to how long it takes to earn it.
Tackle the source, if there is one.
 
Just from my own experience.

Gambling is all I used to spend my spare money on . Online slots mainly . It sucks you in . It’s the dopamine in your brain. You need that buzz of the big win . Enough to make it worthwhile . Then that buzz goes and you need it again and again. Except every time it’s not quite the same so you play higher stakes to try and get that buzz .

It’s a vicious circle and I got to a point where there was no buzz anymore.

At that point it’s just habit . Sneaky twenty here , twenty there . All adds up .

You have to just ban yourself using the online tools and self exclusions . Then in them next few days find something to do, anything!!

That dopamine hunger feeling you get will subside and it does get easier .

That’s just what I did . It’s hard at first then you just hate what that whole industry stands for .

Hope this helps anyone who reads it .
 
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