Maybe in time I'll be ready
Advice needed
For your own sanity, let it go.
Sorry to be harsh with this next line but it needs saying...
She doesn't love you.
The sooner you realise this, the sooner your life will become calmer and better.
And yes, I have been there (Dec 2020).
I'm trying JD
And i know she doesn't. Or she wouldn't treat me like she does
I'll get there
Good man, this post of yours is the 1st step.
The fact you have finally - on here at least - acknowledged she doesn't love you is a massive hurdle jumped.
It gets easier, trust me.
In May, I am attending a gig where I am 99% certain the ex will be there with her ugly (genuinely, he is) BF whom I was dumped for, after being led on via sex, after we had officially split.
I cannot wait to laugh my ass off.
Felt shit to say. But I know it will help me move on.
- Joined
- Jan 12, 2020
- Messages
- 6
There’s no maybe mate, you will.
One day it won’t be the first thing you think about when you wake up, it might be the second but it’ll come.
Keep talking 👍🏻
Give it time. You probably needed to give an explanation of where you are at and how you got there so makes sense you would have said a lot whilst they listened
Yeah I suppose you're right. She's not a mind reader is she so she will have needed the back story etc
Also that can be cathartic sometimes as it helps you place stuff in your own head and start linking it together. It may work, it may not, but ultimately you are trying to break the chain and you've took back some control. So lets keep on with the positive steps
Yeah you're right mate
- Joined
- Jul 12, 2004
- Messages
- 6,637
That’s great news. Good start 👍
Thats exactly how it should be, you doing all the talking, and her guiding a little. She won’t give any advice at all, rather let you, through discussion and talking, come to your own decisions. She will advise you on coping strategies, to help you cope with your emotions,
Youve obviously done great today. We’ll done to you 👍👍👍👍👍
- Joined
- Jan 29, 2019
- Messages
- 53,859
Exactly the way the first session should be. It gives her the baseline of your feelings and issues which can then be approached in a stepwise process in the following sessions
Yeah I understand that. I suppose by "advice " I mean coping strategies
That's reassuring James. Thanks mate
I’m a long way from being an expert on this but please rest assured that the lady knows exactly what she’s doing and you should see progress over the next few sessions. You’re doing exactly the right thing and my prayers are with you - I don’t know if you’re religious but they can’t do any harm!
Good for you for keeping the appointment, it’s the first step on the road to YOUR future. Stick with it 👍
Exactly this.
You will find you just pour it all out. That’s what you need to clear your brain.
I know this sounds really stupid but, if ever I am struggling or keep wanting to do something I splash my face in cold water.
The reason, because whenever I got upset or got in bother over something as a child my dad used to tell me to do so (usually after a bollocking for trying to poison my sister or something). I still do it to this day, and so do my kids. Sounds ridiculous…….but it works.
I do the cold water thing too. Didn't know it was a 'thing'.