Well my worst fears have been confirmed. She's been talking to a man on tinder. He's coming round tomorrow. Absolutely broken.
Now you endure.
And you will.
Because you have no choice.
And because once the worst happens, the fear itself no longer hangs over you.
I remember the first time I bumped into my ex with another bloke. We weren`t divorced yet when it happened.. She was still my wife. That means something. I`d been working away for a year and was out on the beer late on a saturday night, all three of us old mates absolutely rat-arsed, and I was sort of enjoying myself . But there was a pain still inside me. A thorn. I felt that pain everytime I woke up, everywhere I went.
The three of us went for a Chinese, somewhere where the staff had known me for years. We stood waiting at the counter for our order, our backs to the entrance. There was suddenly a strange hush in the room. My mates seemed to have disappeared from my side. The staff were looking horrified over my shoulder.
I turned slowly to see what was behind me. It was my wife and her new bloke. There was total silence and everyone just stood still.
Then I saw my two mates, back outside now, through the window. They were absolutely pissing themselves. I took the food, walked out and joined them, and as soon as were were out of sight, began to laugh too. We didn`t stop all the way home.
Every time I thought of it, all I could think was `Thank fuck this time it wasn`t me that had to take her home` . I actually felt a little sorry for him. He looked a nice guy, and didn`t know what he was getting into.
I slept well. The thorn was gone. It was a mercifully fast closure for a small but seeping wound. Healing was fast, after that.
